21 million Brits regret not asking a loved one more about their life before they died

06 November 2026

• Personal stories, family memories and life experiences among those most likely to be the topics that Britons wish they’d asked a loved one about.
• The findings also reveal that family becomes increasingly important with age, with two-thirds (66%) of over-65s saying it is key to a life well lived.
• Sense of humour was among the things that Britons would most like to be remembered for, with almost a third (29%) agreeing as such.
• Co-op Funeralcare has partnered with Lili Myers, wife of former Hairy Biker Dave Myers, to encourage people to make time to have conversation with their loved ones.

21 million (40%) UK adults wish they’d asked a loved one more about their life before they died, according to new research commissioned by Co-op Funeralcare.

The member-owned organisation's findings highlight that personal stories and memories (33%) are the things people most wish they'd known more about after losing a loved one, ahead of family history (28%) and their childhood (23%). In addition, one in seven (14%) wish that they’d known their loved one’s funeral wishes.

The findings suggest that what matters most when reflecting on a life is not achievements or status, but relationships, shared experiences and the memories we leave behind.

Indeed, in terms of what contributes to a life well lived, Brits were most likely to cite maintaining family relationships (50%), ahead of friendships (38%) and having financial security (33%).

The findings point to a clear generational divide on this, however. Two-thirds (66%) of over-65s say family relationships are among life's most important measures of success, compared with just 39% of 18-34-year-olds.

Younger adults are more likely to prioritise fitness (21%) and career success (19%), compared with 10% and 7% of over-65s, respectively. Older generations are also significantly more likely to prioritise friendships, with almost half (47%) of over 55s saying that they matter compared with just under a third (32%) of under 55s.

The findings reveal that views on life achievements also vary by age as 25-34-year-olds are more likely than any other age group to view a job promotion as their biggest achievement (21%), compared to less than one in 10 (9%) over 65s.

While views on what makes a life well lived differ between generations, many older adults still look back on their lives with a strong sense of fulfilment, with almost half of over-65s (45%) believing they achieved the dreams they held as a teenager. *

However, the older generation also point to certain things they’d do differently if they had their time again. More than a third of over-65s (35%) wish they'd travelled more and over three in 10 (31%) wish they'd kept in touch with people more often. Notably, nearly a tenth (9%) regret never confessing romantic feelings to someone.

When it comes to remembering loved ones, it’s the small, everyday things that matter. Music is a powerful reminder, with almost one in three (31%) saying that certain songs make them think of someone they’ve lost. Anniversaries (30%) and food (21%) are also among the things most likely to keep memories alive, while for one in 10 (10%) a certain smell is the strongest reminder.

Yet while achievements and milestones help shape a life, they are not necessarily what people want to be remembered for. Brits would most like to be remembered for their loyalty (31%) followed by their sense of humour (29%) and generosity (16%), rather than for professional achievements (6%).

Co-op Funeralcare is partnering with Lili Myers, coach, author and wife of Hairy Biker Dave Myers to encourage people to make time to have conversations with loved ones about memories, achievements and the life they’ve lived, as well as their funeral wishes.

Lili Myers, coach, author and wife of Hairy Biker Dave Myers said:

“You have to make the time to talk, otherwise you will regret it. If you don't find the space now, when? Life happens, and you might not have the chance to do it again.

“After Dave's cancer diagnosis, we spent many moments talking about the dreams we had, the plans we'd made and the beautiful memories we'd shared, both funny and sad. He would want to be remembered as someone who loved life. He always said: "If you want to do something, do it the whole way.

“But Dave refused to talk about his funeral with me, so we were relying on clues from things he'd mentioned before. Although he had a fitting send off in the end, looking back, I wish I'd had the wisdom to help him open up about his wishes. We need to normalise these discussions, not only to prepare for what's coming, but to accept it as part of life.”

Caoilionn Hurley, Managing Director of Co-op Funeralcare said:

At Co-op Funeralcare we believe every life is unique, and every person has a story worth telling. Our research shows that while people are proud of many achievements, it is often the relationships they've built, the memories they've shared and the impact they've had on others that matter most when they're remembered.

"Sadly, many families are left wishing they had asked one more question or heard one more story. That's why it's so important to share those stories while we have the chance.

“Funerals are about so much more than saying goodbye. They provide an opportunity to celebrate a life, share treasured memories and ensure that the stories that define someone live on for future generations."

-Ends-

Notes to editors:

Survey of 2,000 UK adults nat rep commissioned by Co-op Funeralcare and carried out by Opinion Matters.

• 40% of UK adult population (53,188,204) = 21,275,281

** 1,000 people in the UK aged 65 and over

About Co-op

Co-op Group is one of the world’s largest consumer co-operatives, operating across food retail, funerals, insurance and legal services. Owned by around 7.2 million active member-owners, Co-op exists to meet their needs and champion the causes they care about. With more than 2,300 food stores, 800 funeral homes and a wholesale business supplying around 8,000 additional outlets, Co-op employs 53,000 colleagues and generates annual revenues of over £11 billion. It is a recognised leader in ethical business and community-led programmes, creating long-term value for members and communities across the UK.

For any enquiries, please contact: pressoffice@coop.co.uk